The ‘mother daughter angle’ !


‘When you become a mother yourself , you will realize !’ …Oh well , isn’t this a cliché  all of us , girls have grown up listening to ?

I always saw it as an exaggerated usage of an over emotional mother , who doesn’t find any other way to support her arguments and uses this as her last resort  , the ‘mother’ bomb ! ( I always felt motherhood was so overrated back then ! )

But now , I am not so sure …. Today as a mother to an almost four year old daughter , I  find myself repeating a lot of my mom’s statements (much to my own embarrassment  !).

Here are a few points I would have perhaps covered in my defense against my mother’s over protective demeanor , when I was a teenager  :

1. Mom , I am not cold and I don’t need that scarf to spoil my hair style !

2. I am big enough to go out on my own.

3. I am not raising my voice .. I am only conveying my point.

4. I will decide what shoes go with my dress…and anyway your fashion sense doesn’t agree with mine !

5. I am not hungry right now so please stop coaxing me to eat.

6. I will cross the road carefully , you don’t have to say it all the time !

7. Stop holding me by hand in public , I can walk on my own so stop embarrassing me !

8. I will prepare well for my exams so please don’t nag me ..

9. Yes…I am a little late , but it is still not dark .

10.Mom I am going out to a birthday party , and I will ‘not’ talk to strangers !

Today when I remember those things I argued about , I no longer understand them… Perhaps I am  ageing …or perhaps because I am mom now !

Today , when I don’t see my little girl around the house , my heart skips a beat . If her school van is a little late , my mind starts racing and imagining the worst . When I take her out , excited to dress her up the way I want , she tells me ‘Ma…I don’t want to wear this dress‘ and brings me the one she wants to wear …

Sometimes , when she refuses to listen to me , warm tears fill my eyes…… and I realize the turn of the tide……the reversal of roles…….

Here are the answers I am prepared to give my daughter , if she brings out the list , I once prepared myself ,as a teenager….:

1. Little darling , your hairstyle can be  fixed again , but I can’t risk the same with your health .

2. No matter how big you ‘become’, or how many grand children you go on to have , you shall always be my little toddler , and I  will always feel protective about you……

3. If I am not raising my voice with you , so shouldn’t you….We shall talk , not argue…

4. Oh yes , you have a great fashion sense , but so did I when I was your age …

5. I know you are not hungry but am sure you  will be , in sometime . I am just being selfish , because it hurts me to imagine you hungry !

6. I know you will cross the road carefully , but it satisfies me to advise you , time and again. So just bear with me !

7. I know you are  a grown up girl now and don’t need my hand…but I need you to hold mine , just to feel secure …

8. Yes , you do prepare your lessons on your own but asking you to do so repeatedly makes me feel I am a responsible mother , interested in your affairs .

9. It is alright to be late but do let me know about your whereabouts so that I don’t keep worrying about your safety .

10 Oh , you can talk to strangers if you want , but keep the phone with you all the time . So that I feel I am close to you …

Well….I guess that’s life …What goes around ,comes around …….


22 thoughts on “The ‘mother daughter angle’ !

  1. Bang on post!! my thoughts r exactly the same as yours..the very questions which used to irritate me when i was young , strangely i find myself asking my daughter the same..but again ..thats the only way we can act as long as we care for n adore our little ones and wish the best for them.So probably its only once we r “moms” does this realization strike us..of how much our mom loved and cared for us !! great post dear !! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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