Trials and tribulations

Life is always so unpredictable ! Well , at least when you are a soldier’s wife all the more . Many of my friends have asked me how I handle being so far away from my better  half , so frequently , when they cannot  even imagine a day without their’s . Well I think life teaches you a lot of things the hard way…

When I was a newly wed army wife (or lady wife as referred to in the army ! ), I had similar opinions as them . I was a naive girl , who was afraid to stay all alone in  a house , or even travel by myself ! I was brought up in a metro city , yet I hadn’t really ventured out to far away places on my own …

Yet , today things have changed…I have traveled alone to far off places , even on International trips with a two year old toddler , dangling by my side . I have  now stayed alone , for nights in old , dilapidated bungalows (that belonged to the Nizam’s army ) and stayed without talking to my Husband for days (owing to poor mobile connectivity ! ).

I would be lying  , if I were to say I am not afraid anymore. I am still afraid , still jittery , but I have learnt to face my fears now .  One’s success is not in being ‘unafraid’ but in being aware of one’s fears and preparing to conquer them .

I guess , in the Army  life we do not have a choice . Sometimes if you want to be with your husband , even if it means only for a short while , you are willing to go that extra mile , just to see that smile on the face of your daughter /son  , when she/he meets her dad and vice versa .

Every time I go through a long , tiresome journey  to meet him , my heart is  filled with excitement and happiness , and in the face of these emotions , the weaker emotions like fear , nervousness and discomfort take a back seat .

Some of my friends belonging to a civilian life (as in non army background )  , call me brave , to have married an army officer . But honestly , I am not being brave , I am just adapting… and so will anybody else in my place.

Every human being had this innate instinct to adapt to his/her surroundings and this adaptability is essential for survival . So no matter what situation one is in , there is always a way out , if not , we can create it .

Most of modern day inventions and innovations today are a result of this adapation . It is the very life force that makes a drowning man , hold on to the next available thing to cling on to , so that he can keep afloat .

This life force is present in all of us , just that many of us do not realize it and give up on things quickly. It is when life gets tough , that we realize our true strengths , our capabilities. Of course it does depend from one person to another , as to how you emerge at the end of the hurricane . Some break down , while others grow stronger and more resilient .

Being an army officer’s wife it will , without doubt be the latter .

The other day I was watching the interview of an army wife , who lost her husband , in a military operation  an year ago . What I saw in her eyes were not , tears of a  dejected woman who was now a widow , rather a sense of immense pride  and fortitude that would have moved even the hardest of hearts . She was smiling and eloquent through out  and the nation salutes her stoicism.

She didn’t choose her destiny , especially when she had a four year old daughter by her side , yet she faced it with dignity. She rose from the ashes , much like the mythical Phoenix  , with a vengeance . 

From where does she draw her strength..? How did she manage to keep such a cheerful disposition ,in the face of such  heart wrenching  trauma . Now , that is what I call the life force . The inner strength , that guides all , yet only a few care to listen .

 Everyone has their fears , their problems , their anxieties , but do not let these conquer you , instead , learn to cheat them and be a winner . .. I am still on my way ..

Here is a link to that interview if you want to have a look . It is truly inspiring…….. :

26 thoughts on “Trials and tribulations

  1. Sweety, this is an amazing post! May I ask what country you live in? When I was reading I kept thinking the U.S.A. and I thought you lived in India. Help me clear up my confusion. 🙂 You are an “amazing” officer of the Army lady wife!

    Liked by 1 person

      • Thank you for the explaination. I imagine it is the same feeling being an army (soldier/officer’s) wife in India as it is in US, and it isn’t an easy life for the women who have to be away from their husbands. I wish you the very best! (hugs) xo

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Oh, your hubby is in Army. That’s a news to me 🙂

    I did watch that interview of Indhu Mukund (w/o Mukund Varadarajan) and I was swearing at the anchor for asking questions over and over about their life, but alas seeing her face those questions with lot of courage did make me smile. Amazing lady she is, I must admit.

    Like I said in one of my posts, we all have devils and angels. Circumstances decides on which one would spring out. Keep going young lady 🙂


    Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh yes, I had the same thoughts when I watched Indu Mukund’s interview…her pride and stoic expression that she had when she received the gallantry award in place of her husband is truly beyond words…I am sure she is putting her brave front to help her daughter and family go through the tough time better…

    I am so happy that you shared your feelings and thoughts of being an army wife…the fear, the excitement and the fun times.. My Dad lived in Nagaland for more than 35 years, though not in the Armed Forces. Every time we went to visit him, it was like a month long Diwali and whenever he was not reachable on phone, our hearts sure did miss a beat…So, I totally can empathize what you and your daughter are going through. It is just that we must sure that we relish every single moment in the best way we can…

    Liked by 1 person

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