Just a memory………

A few days ago a college mate of mine (I hadn’t been in touch with him ever since we last met about five years back ) passed away …but it was no accident . He killed himself ….

I was shocked to hear the news , more so because I could not imagine some one as intelligent as him to do something like this to himself . Since I don’t want to reveal his real name , let me refer to him as SG .

SG was a student of English literature . We both were pursuing the B.ed degree (Bachelor of Education ) , and used to be the ones to anchor most shows and other cultural events , that were held in college .

When I first saw SG , I thought (and so did many of my other friends ) he was just an arrogant and haughty young lad , who was a little too proud of his language skills . But it took me only a few interactions with him , to reveal to me that he was none of the above .

SG was a poet and philosopher . He was a reserved person and his closed nature was often mistaken for arrogance . He would just sit and stare into oblivion , or at the vast expanse of the sky , in the midst of a conversation .

Once we even attended an Arts festival representing our college , and both of us won accolades in our respective fields . But in all our conversations , SG never really opened up about his personal life or problems , not once . He did have his share of financial problems but was never really frank about them . I knew it , because he borrowed some money from me once , which he returned without ado .

 I remember there was a time he fell seriously ill , during the course , but returned with a bang !  In fact , a lot of us failed to recognize him when he  returned from the hospital  – in place of his lean , pale self was a much heavier and rosier version of SG  . But cheerful all the same …

But that was him ..his spirited self…Anyone in his place , might have abandoned the course but he did not … He returned and finished it .

Oh , and I didn’t tell you another thing about him . SG had an inter- religious love marriage , much to the distaste of the girl’s parents . But this of course happened much before he joined the B.ed course… So , he wasn’t the kind  to shy away from problems , if he was , he wouldn’t have married his lady love , against such stiff opposition….

 Hence ,when I learnt that  SG had hanged himself to the ceiling of his rented apartment , you can gauge my utter shock at the news . You might even wonder , why I was not in touch with him over these years…

Well , SG wasn’t really a ‘people’ person.. He was a loner , only  in touch  with an odd friend here and there …He was not active on any of the social media sites  either .

He was pursuing M.Phil  in the same college where he was teaching . I just cannot fathom , the depth of the problem that tormented him enough to let go . What worried him so much  that he didn’t even take his wife into confidence ?

Anyway , I have missed the details of five years of his life after the course , which is a big enough time for new problems to have come into his life . But what irks me is the fact that none of his close friends , could guess the workings of his poetic mind …

His death does raise one important questions about our society today . Have we all become so preoccupied with our own lives , that we fail to notice the problems of our next door neighbor or even our close friend ? Has this so called ‘virtual world’ of social media sites  , brought us far from each other than near…? Is our love for  our friends and family getting restricted to likes and comments on his pictures , which may not even be reflecting the reality of his ‘real’ life ?

Or is today’s generation too weak to handle stress? Are we so used to a cushioned lifestyle that even a slight strain in it , leads to to take steps with dire consequences….? Is our educational system to blame somewhere…?

I don’t know…perhaps I too am a victim of this era …

As for SG … I wonder if he had just talked about his problems to someone , just let it pour out , perhaps he would still have been alive …here in this world…and not just in our memories…


Words soft and melodious

 can mend a broken heart

Words crisp yet coarse

can push one to a great  start

Words honeyed and saccharine

 can trap a gentle soul

words maleficent and mean

can distract one from the goal

Words indignant and fiery

can  terrify one into submission

words laced  with  bitter  sarcasm

 can quell one’s motivation

Words  have a might

They are nobody’s toy

For they own  the right

to ‘create’ or ‘destroy’ !


A moment in time…… God’s canvas


What was the last picture you took? Tell us the story behind it.

Alright , so I was out in the garden one fine day.. (remember the nursery rhyme..? ). Well , it was evening time and I saw some birds flying above me , actually it was some crows …

Well , for some odd reason , they were cawing around menacingly and more so when I tried to shoot them ! Now hold your horses  people…I mean ‘shoot’ with a camera 😛 .

Anyway , since the crows were in no mood to pose for me or stop to say a ‘hi’ , I decided to look elsewhere to fulfill my creative hunger or thirst or whatever!

And that’s  when I spotted these  images and narrow silhouettes of some branches , leaves and flowers  , against the background of the evening sky…. , and decided to click away…

And they worked just fine , in fact it looked like they were some sort of sketches on God’s canvas , the sky .. minimal yet striking in their contours …

Hope you will agree with me ….





The New Dawn


Every dismal , dreary dark hour 

is followed by a youthful , sanguine dawn

 when the raw rays of the rising golden orb ,

touch down upon the woebegone land

replenishing it with renewed optimism

 thus , giving impulse to a

new , and throbbing


Retail magic !

There are these days when one feels utterly useless …days when one feels enervated ; when the mundane things in life fail to impress and the drudgery of a monotonous life , comes to hit you …When even the most interesting of things seems ho hum and insipid and one longs for a break in the routine…a fresh lease of life …..

It is in times like these one wishes to do the vanishing act , to escape to an exotic island in some far corner of the world or enjoy a relaxing holiday in a quaint European town. (I have this obsession with European countryside , nurtured  by the fairy and adventure tales I read as a child and further facilitated by my own trips to some of these beautiful places …. )

But what does one do when none of these options are viable ? To me the solution is clear – ‘Retail therapy’.

Shopping or ‘retail therapy’ as it is aptly referred to as , is indeed a stress buster , drawing your attention away from the some oppressing realities of life , however only temporarily , and letting you drown yourself , albeit happily , in a sea of clothes , shoes and accessories !

I am not an advocate of wasteful spending and neither would I advise the same to anyone …But , then some small indulgences ,  here and there , just to lighten one’s mood , is not a crime either . After all , we have but one life and if an extra pair of shoes can make you forget your worries and be cheerful for a while , I think it is worth every penny you spend..

There is one really irritating thing about an uneventful life , which is  the fact that , at exactly the same time when you feel your life is such a drab , you will  notice the lives of  all those around you to be exceptionally exciting and eventful…….. And this in turn will make you hate your life even more !

Whenever I get engulfed by  such  an inactive and lackluster life , I treat myself to some shopping … So a few days back I got myself a pair of shoes , and believe  me ( although I know I sound crazy ! ) , things have started looking up since then … I have started looking forward to life in general and to the times I will get to use those shoes , in particular 😛

I guess , life is not that complicated , if we let it be so . Sometimes , it is not about money or use or anything else , sometimes it is all about the ‘simple joys of life’. We need to unwind ourselves and let our muscles loose at times…and indulge…for this life shall not come again !

A tight , rule bound existence , meant to please everyone else , but oneself , cannot last for long .

And besides , when I am on my death bed , I would definitely not want to regret  about the things I did not do , the shoes I did not buy or the place I did not visit …

So do it all now…when you have the time…As for me , these shoes will last me sometime , I mean in terms of joy and rejuvenation , till of course , my life becomes more eventful , which I am hoping it will soon be… 😀